Fuck me.
Fuck me.
Fuck me.
Just when I felt happy and secure and that things were going well. I saw my ex. And now there is this nagging thought of him in the back of my head that says “you fucked up, you broke it off with the wrong guy…you are an idiot”.
I really like the current boyfriend, but it’s sometimes hard to see a future with him. He doesn’t love to travel like I do, he doesn’t have a ton of hobbies like I do, sometimes I’m not sure why I like him other than him being a nice guy and being incredibly hot and sexy.
I feel sick to my stomach just typing that.
Then theres the ex. Funny, friendly, loves travel, caring, everything I ever wanted except that I was too scared to be with him and it was too serious too fast.
What the fuck do I do? I can’t stop thinking about him and ya, he isn’t as beautiful as the current guy, but hes so stable and safe and so wonderful.
I’m such an idiot for being in this situation.
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“Voldemort is my past, present, and future.”
— Tom Riddle, Harry Potter & The Chamber of Secrets (2002)
Source: feelgood-inc
Quote reblogged from News from the File Marked DUH. with 226 notes
She wants to know if I love her, that’s all anyone wants from anyone else, not love itself but the knowledge that love is there, like new batteries in the flashlight in the emergency kit in the hall closet.
Source: wreck-loose
And whatever you say, lending a book is not the same when it is an e-book. When we want someone to love us, what do we do? Well, what I do is food, champagne, and a book, or several books, things I love and want to lend – as physical objects, not as virtual exchanges – not least because love and friendship are more than virtual places, is sending an e-book just the same for you as a parcel in the post with a book in it, and a note, and someone’s handwriting?
No. I did, sometimes, in the two years that happened between the end of my relationship with Deborah Warner and meeting Susie Orbach. It was a specific loneliness though, not for company, not for my friends, who are fabulous, but for the person I could say everything to and be heard. And the person I could say nothing to, and still be heard. The possibility of silence. The alone in the presence of the other that offers such deep well-being.
There is hope but we need a new beginning like never before.
There are ways in which each of us can make a difference. You will know what they are in your life. I am working things out in mine. It is a restless time of uncertainty and the wrong kind of change, but the right can of change can happen.
“What happens in a certain place can stain your feelings for that location, just as ink can stain a white sheet. You can wash it, and wash it, and still never forget what has transpired.”
—- Lemony Snicket, Horseradish: The Bitter Truth’s You Can’t Avoid.
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“Everyone, at some point in their lives, wakes up in the middle of the night with the feeling that they are all alone in the world, and that nobody loves them now and that nobody will ever love them, and that they will never have a decent night’s sleep again and will spend their lives wandering blearily around a loveless landscape, hoping desperately that their circumstances will improve, but suspecting in their heart of hearts, that they will remain unloved forever. The best thing to do in these circumstances is to wake someone else up, so that they can feel this way, too.”
—- Lemony Snicket, Horseradish
Source: feelgood-inc
